Create Your Own Hope When Plans Change

Day of Hope #124 - Thursday April 13, 2023

Goal: Spend intentional time with my sister and create our own hope along the way

Quote: Life doesn’t have to be perfect to be wonderful.” – Annette Funicello

Well, this Day of Hope did not go exactly as planned. But as so often happens, it turned into exactly the day I needed. One of the things I had put on my vision board for 2023 was “The Year of the Sisters.” I wanted to be intentional about spending quality time with my sisters instead of simply saying, “We need to get together sometime.”

I thought that maybe because for Valentine’s Day last month I found this amazing resort, Five Pines located in Sisters, Oregon that maybe that was the sisters item from my vision board. HA!

Nope there must be several sister events. I asked my sister to choose a weekend to come visit me in Idaho. Originally, she picked April 14th through the 16th. Then she decided to come on the 13th instead. Perfect!

Apparently, the universe knew that The Year of the Sisters needed its own Day of Hope.

Off to One of Our Favorite Places

We both slept in, took our time getting ready, and left my place around noon. Our destination was St. Chapelle Winery near Caldwell, Idaho, a place that holds some wonderful memories for us.

When we arrived, it was packed with the lunch crowd, but we managed to get the coolest little table for two. It was made from wine barrels, with wine corks under a glass tabletop. We sat by the window overlooking the vineyards. It was still April, so the vineyards weren't in bloom yet and it was too cold to enjoy the patio, but the view was still beautiful.

We had come here many times over the years for wine tasting, although things had changed. Instead of choosing the wines we wanted to taste, they now offered predetermined flights. A little disappointing, but no big deal. We already knew which wines we liked. The bigger issue was that it took forever for someone to take our food order.

But even that turned into a gift because it gave us plenty of time to sit together and remember a very special day from 2017.

Remembering a Race, and a Friend

In August 2017, my sister and one of her beautiful friends Sarah came from Utah to Boise to participate in a wine run at St. Chapelle. The night before the race, we spent time with my walking partner and dear friend, Mr. D. And we drank wine. A lot of wine. Way too much wine. We laughed until our stomachs hurt and our cheeks were sore.

Unfortunately, the next morning we had to get up and participate in a 10K race—6.2 miles. Excellent planning on our part. We had originally planned to lightly jog the race. Ha!

That plan disappeared somewhere around the previous night's bottle of wine. We made it to the starting line, had a light snack and, because apparently we had learned absolutely nothing, sampled a little more wine. Then we walked. And walked. And walked.

The course through the vineyards was beautiful, but as the day warmed up, those 6.2 miles started feeling very long. Then, just when we were almost finished, there was one final hill. Why do races always seem to put a hill near the end? If you want repeat customers, put the hill first!

But we finished.

We received our medals and commemorative wine glasses, and most importantly, we created a memory together that we would never forget. That memory meant even more on this Day of Hope because my sister's friend had recently passed away.

Sitting in the winery again, we weren't just remembering a funny race. We were remembering her. The laughter. The friendship. The ridiculous night before the race. The long walk through the vineyards. The fact that we were lucky enough to share that experience by her side. Sometimes memories become more precious when one of the people inside them is no longer here to make new ones.

In Search of a Little Hope

Eventually, our food arrived, and thankfully, it was delicious. We each enjoyed one glass of wine and savored our lunch. But something felt different. The winery had changed. Maybe we had changed too.

As we sat there, we realized that perhaps this was one of those places that had served its purpose in our lives. We had wonderful memories there, but we didn't necessarily need to keep trying to recreate them.

Sometimes it's okay to love a memory without needing to repeat it.

But this was my Day of Hope, and we weren't finished yet. So, we came up with a new mission. We were going to find a server somewhere who looked like they had a little hope for life inside them!

Off we went to Sawtooth Winery down the road. Surely we'd find our hopeful person there. Nope. We ordered a wine flight and some nuts and snacks, but once again, the experience felt a little flat.

When we decided to leave, I asked for a container for the nuts. You would have thought I had requested ownership of the winery. It took forever to get something to put them in. For a moment, I considered simply walking out with the nut dish. But eventually, they handed me a to-go cup. And the funniest part? I still use that little cup on our cheese boards.

So technically, even the disappointing winery experience gave me something useful. We may not have found our hopeful server that day. We decided we'd just have to provide the hope ourselves.

Sometimes You Create Your Own Hope

We headed back to my townhouse, changed into comfy clothes, put on a movie, and relaxed. And you know what? It was wonderful.

The next morning, our sister weekend continued with one of our favorite things: a full spa day. We had planned on getting the honey Hawaiian steam wrap, but apparently this weekend had decided that plans were merely suggestions. The steam room was down. Of course it was. So, we course-corrected again and chose the detox wrap instead.

Then came massages, facials, pedicures, more movies, more talking, more laughing, and plenty of time simply being sisters. Then off to Cafe Ole’ our favorite Mexican spot. We invited a few family members to join us for dinner.

The weekend wasn't perfect. The wineries weren't what we remembered. The service wasn't great. The steam room didn't work. And several things didn't happen the way we had pictured them.

But none of that mattered. Because the real goal wasn't wine. It wasn't a spa treatment. It wasn't even having the perfect Day of Hope. The goal was time with my sister.

And we got exactly that. We talked. We laughed. We remembered someone we had lost. We pampered ourselves. We caught up on life. And we created new memories to sit beside the old ones.

Maybe that's what The Year of the Sisters was really supposed to be about. Not creating perfect experiences. Just intentionally choosing one another.

My Lesson of Hope: Not every Day of Hope will go according to plan, and neither will life. Places change, people leave us, steam rooms break, and sometimes you can't even find a hopeful waitress. But joy doesn't have to depend on everything going right. When the plan changes, make a course correction. Hold tightly to the people who matter, treasure the memories you've already made, and don't wait for someone else to bring the hope. Sometimes you have to create it yourself.