Find Hope When Life Doesn’t Go as Planned

Day of Hope #127 - Thursday July 13, 2023

Goal: Make the day mine, even when life doesn't go according to plan

Quote: “Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans.” – John Lennon

This Day of Hope was definitely not the day I expected.

I had planned to take the day off work, but Board documents were due and I still didn't have anyone who could completely back me up. I hoped I could at least leave by noon. No such luck. I ended up working almost the entire day.

There was one fun little coincidence at work, though. It was National French Fry Day, so we had a special lunch with Chick-fil-A sandwiches and, of course, French fries. We also had baseball shirts made for the executives with our names and favorite numbers on the back. Anyone want to guess mine? #13. Of course.

I Still Made It My Day

I finally left work around 5:00 p.m. At that point, it would have been really easy to say, Well, there goes my Day of Hope. But I didn't. I went home, packed a bag, and headed straight to the pool.

It was 95 degrees and sunny, and after a long workday, getting into that water felt wonderful. I floated for a while, journaled, and simply let myself decompress.

I love my townhouse and the pool here, and that evening I was especially grateful for it. Around 7:30, the sun started disappearing behind the building. I packed up, headed home, took a shower, and watched the sunset from my patio.

No, this wasn't the Day of Hope I had planned. But I realized something important: The day didn't have to be perfect, or even completely mine, for me to still claim part of it.

I couldn't control the work demands that came up. But I could control what I did when the workday ended. So instead of writing the day off as a loss, I turned the hours I had left into something that felt good. I still made it my Day of Hope.

Remembering Mr. D.

There was something much bigger on my heart this month. I lost my very dear friend and longtime walking partner, Mr. D. He was truly one of my soulmate friends.

Mr. D. and I shared so many adventures over the years, including my very first offical half marathon. 13.1 miles. How fitting is that? My journals are filled with stories about the two of us, walking, talking, laughing, watching movies, eating cherry pie, and simply doing life together.

After he passed, I found myself watching Hallmark movies and reruns of The Golden Girls because those were some of his favorite things for us to watch together. I even bought myself a cherry pie. We both loved cherry pie, so eating it felt like a small way to sit with my friend again.

I am incredibly grateful that I had the opportunity to see him the month before he passed. He was living in a memory-care center, and by then, he couldn't always say my name. But when I walked into his room that last time, he gave me the biggest smile. He knew me. Maybe not in the way he once had, but somewhere inside him, he knew me.

I sat beside him for hours holding his hand and telling him how much I loved him. When I finally left and started driving away, I had a feeling deep inside me. This might be the last time I see him. And I was right. As painful as that is, I'm also incredibly thankful that our last visit wasn't rushed.

I got to sit with him. Hold his hand. Look at his face. And most importantly, tell him that I loved him. There was nothing left unsaid. My Walking Partner Is Still Walking With Me

Now, when I walk along the Greenbelt, I still talk to Mr. D. We have some pretty great conversations. I tell him what's happening in my life. I tell him about the things I'm working on, the things I'm excited about, and probably a few things he'd tell me I was worrying too much about.

And I imagine him on the other side, free from pain and remembering everything again. I miss my walking partner terribly. But I also know how lucky I was to have a friendship worth missing this much.

Not everyone gets a Mr. D. I did. And for that, my heart will always be grateful.

Love you, Mr. D. Keep walking with me.

My Lesson of Hope: Life will not always give you the day you planned, and sometimes it will give you a loss you never wanted. Claim the moments you can. Tell people you love them while they're here. Hold their hands a little longer. Make the memories. And when someone you love is no longer beside you, carry the best parts of them forward. Hope doesn't mean we don't grieve. Sometimes hope is knowing that love can continue long after goodbye.